The Void Read online

  “G’day, Podster,” I said.

  “Uh…hello. Uh, Elton? Elton Rigby?”

  “The one and only.” I liked the way my voice sounded. It had a sing-song quality to it when I took drugs. A happy, pleasant voice. I made a mental note to record myself later. “Who’s this?”

  “Oh good! You’re out.”

  “Out?”

  “This is Ryan Milton. I was one of the other contestants—

  “Ryan! My man,” I said loudly. First the drugs, now this. I knew things were going to look up for me. “I hear you didn’t make the two weeks either. Shit mate, it was hard, wasn’t it? Way harder than I thought it would be. Damn it was boring as f—

  “You didn’t make it either?”

  He seemed surprised, which pleased me. It bode well with me that I came across as the sort of person who would’ve coped. Yet another proof that people still saw me the way I wanted them to. “I was close, but I got to a point when it didn’t seem worth it to me. How about you? How long were you in there for?”

  Ryan mumbled something I couldn’t understand. It sounded like he was talking with his hand over the receiver.

  “I didn’t catch that. The line’s gone fuzzy.”

  “Six days. Pretty poor.”

  “Six days!” I exclaimed with excitement and then instantly felt bad for the guy, but happy for me. At least I’d almost made it. I wouldn’t be seen as the guy who couldn’t even make a full week. “Ah, don’t worry, mate. Like I said, it wasn’t easy in there. Hey, how’d you get my number? That weirdo, Larry, give it to you?”

  “No, I…I looked it up.”

  I grinned. I hadn’t pegged Ryan as the sort of guy who appreciated good comedy.

  “You did? Cool. So cool,” I said as a new wave of joy hit me. For a moment I’d forgotten I’d even taken that pill. I closed my eyes to allow the rush to run through me. I zoned back in at the sound of Ryan’s voice which had blurred for a little while.

  “Hello? You still there?”

  “I sure am. Sorry. Just…well…what can I do for you Ryan Milton?”

  “Actually, I was looking for my friends, Jon and Keri. I haven’t…”

  “Your friends? You knew them before going in?”

  “Uh, I did. It—

  “Cool! I liked Jon. That guy was hilarious. And his girlfriend was hot as fuck.”

  “She’s very pretty,” Ryan said stiffly, and I knew straight away this was not the sort of guy you could joke around with. In other words, boring. Not the sort of guy who would take kindly to the fact that I was lying in a happy, drug-induced haze while I spoke to him. The thought made me chuckle.

  “So,” I interrupted whatever it was he was telling me. “Why are you calling?”

  “Like I just said, I haven’t heard anything from Jon and Keri yet. Were they still in when you left?”

  “They sure were. Happy as two peas in a pod, I’m assuming. Oh hey, that’s a good one,” I jumped up to look for a paper and pen. “Hang on…” I said as I located a scrap of paper and quickly scribbled the idea down. This would make for a fantastic comedy skit.

  “Right, I’m back. You were saying?” I was slowly losing grip on what this conversation was all about. ‘Jon and Keri!” I said happily as it came back to me. “Yes, they were still inside. But hey, the thing is over now. They should be back.”

  “That’s the thing. I can’t get hold of either of them.”

  “Maybe they took the money and eloped.”

  “No, they wouldn’t do that. Look, it’s probably nothing, but it’s just weird that I haven’t heard from them. They live nearby, but they’re not home and nobody has seen them.”

  “Ooh, do you think that creepy Larry guy murdered them and buried them in their pod?”

  “I’m actually a little worried, so I don’t think—

  “Sorry, sorry. That was insensitive. I’m just messing with ya, mate. So, no sign of the two of them, huh? That is odd. It might’ve been easy for them, but I’m pretty sure they would’ve been dying to get back to normality. Proper food, proper shower, privacy and all that. Unless they were bonking like monkeys in there, of course. Not that I’d blame them. Would make for great telly.”

  “Okay, never mind. I just thought I’d see if you’d heard anything,” Ryan said. It was pretty obvious from the tone of his voice that he no longer wanted to converse with me. Pity really, the guy was boring as all hell, but it was nice having someone to talk to.

  “Hey, sorry, I was just messing around with ya. Listen, I’ve heard nothing, but why don’t you call Larry and find out what’s going on?” I suggested.

  “I don’t have his number. Hey, do you?”

  “No, just his email address. You should try that.”

  “I have. No reply. Do you know his surname? Or the name of the production company?”

  “No. Actually, come to think of it, I know very little about it all. Well, I guess that’s the way they wanted it to be, huh.”

  “I guess.” Ryan’s voice did not match my own. This was a boy who very much needed a bit of my magic white powder.

  “Ryan Milton,” I said as a new wave of joy hit me. “Why don’t you come over and join me for a drink or two or three?”

  “A drink? Don’t you stay in Melbourne?”

  “Sure. How about you?”

  “Sydney.”

  “Oh. Well. Pity.”

  “Uh, I’ll call you if I hear anything,” he said wearily.

  “You do that. I’m sure they’re just off on their next adventure.”

  And with that, I worked on my next line, rolled up my bank note, and got ready to go on an adventure of my own.

  Chapter 28

  Jon

  “Hello! Hello! Can anybody hear me?” I called out.

  “Anything?” Keri asked.

  What felt like a full day had passed since we’d broken up on camera, and I could no longer take the torture. In that time I’d paced the length of the room at least every half an hour, counting my steps each time, as if somehow the space would miraculously get bigger. Eight regular size steps. That was how long it took me to get from one side to the other. Shouldn’t we get a sixteen-stepper if we were in here as a couple? Between every pace of the room I would sit for a while, wondering what to do with myself. I had thought fighting with Keri had been torture, but this weird silence was even worse. It almost didn’t feel like silence, but that was mostly because I could hear her huffing and puffing like a bloody dragon every few minutes. This was Keri’s way of saying she wanted me to apologise to her, without coming right out and asking me to do it. Well, I wasn’t going to say sorry for something I hadn’t done. She was the one who said she wanted to break up with me in the first place. The only thing I wanted to do was to get out of this place, and I no longer thought we had our times wrong. The two weeks were up now, I was sure of it. If anything, we had been in here longer than we were supposed to. So either we were going completely insane, or we’d been forgotten about. Or…or…a million more ideas came to mind, each one worse than the one before. I pounded on the door again, ignoring my ex-girlfriend. If she wanted to know if there was someone calling back on the other side, then she could come over here and knock herself.

  “Hello? Hello? Our time is over. Can anyone hear me? Hello!”

  “Jon, I’m going to press the buzzer,” Keri said.

  I turned around and stared at Keri, who was now making her way over to the buzzer. Ten steps. That was probably how long it took her. She was tall, but not as tall as me, and her steps were shorter. What a stupid thing to be thinking of right now. “Don’t!” I called out before she got to the buzzer.

  “Why not? Maybe they’re not outside the door. What if they’re in some office somewhere?” she said.

  “They should be watching us on the monitors. They must see that we’re calling for help. What’s the point of pressing the buzzer?”

  “What’s the point of not pressing it?” she asked. “Jon, you think we’ve be
en in here longer than we’re supposed to, don’t you?”

  “Well, yes, but…”

  “Then why can’t I press this buzzer? Give me one good reason.”

  “Because…” Why not? She was right. I did not have a valid reason for it. And yet… “Because it would feel like we’ve failed.” Even I realised how stupid that sounded out loud.

  “Failed? But the time is up. You said so yourself.”

  “But…” I hated the thoughts that were coming to me now. “What if it isn’t?”

  “Are you kidding me right now, Jon? You’ve been going on and on about time being up for days now. And if you really don’t think our time is up, then why the hell are you hitting the door like that and calling for help?”

  I slid to the floor. “I don’t know,” I mumbled.

  “You don’t know? I’m pressing it.”

  “Don’t!” I yelled. The sound was so loud it startled me. It clearly startled her too because she was staring at me in shock. We might have our differences, but I’d never once raised my voice at her. “Sorry.”

  “What has gotten into you, Jon? You’ve gone crazy, you know that? You’ve gone absolutely bonkers on me. You. Have. Lost. Your. Mind,” she said as she made her way back to the bed and flopped down on it. She sat down with so much force the edges of the mattress rose. My first thought was saying something about her putting on weight, but I caught myself in time. I held onto the fact that I could still make jokes. If I could do that, then surely I was okay.

  “I haven’t lost my mind,” I said slowly. “I haven’t.”

  “You sure act like you have.”

  “Yeah, well, what do you know?” This was the sort of conversation teenage siblings would have. I had never felt less in control of my mind before, and I had always thought myself to be an extremely controlled person.

  “Okay, I have an idea,” she said.

  “You do? Don’t tell me you want to exercise.”

  She laughed. The first genuine laugh I’d heard for a while. “Of course not. Why don’t we wait another day? Then, if we still haven’t been released, then we hit the buzzer. What do you think?”

  “Another day? Well, okay, that’s not a bad idea. Just in case we are wrong about the time frame. I mean, it doesn’t really make sense. If the time was up, they would’ve opened up for us by now. And surely they can hear us. If they had forgotten about the time then we would’ve reminded them. Maybe we’re in some time warp here where two weeks feels longer than it really is. But…if it’s not over now, then it should be soon. I’m sure of it. One day. I can do that,” I said. “I can do that,” I said again to reassure myself.

  “You can. You’ve done worse things in your life. Imagine what Ray the x-ray would’ve been like in here? He would’ve been far too weak to do something like this.”

  I looked at her in surprise. I had names for all my clients, and Keri was always telling me to stop being so mean about them. This was the first time I’d ever heard her say something even remotely not nice about one of them. “Ray the x-ray,” I mused. It was good to think about our life outside of this place. The thought of going back to the gym and getting back into a routine seemed almost impossible, but it was a good thought regardless. “You know,” I said. “He’s actually a pretty sweet kid. Skinny as a motherfucker, but sweet. And hey, at least he’s trying.” I waited for Keri to reprimand me for swearing, but she didn’t.

  “He’s better than us right now,” she said instead. “We haven’t done any exercise in here. Not even once.”

  “I told you I could last two weeks without exercising.”

  She laughed. “You call this lasting?”

  I chuckled, then sighed. “Hey, bunny…”

  “Yes funny,” she asked sadly.

  “Have we really broken up?”

  She looked like a cartoon as she sighed, the heaviness of it dragging down her shoulders. “I don’t know, Jon. I really don’t know.”

  “I’m so sick of being here,” I said.

  “Me too.”

  “Can I ask you something?”

  “I guess,” she said wearily.

  “Why do you keep showering?”

  “Do I?”

  “You know you do,” I said.

  Another world-weary sigh. “I just never feel clean in here.”

  “Me neither. Do you think they’re pumping drugs into the vent?” I had this sudden desire to talk about everything that had been bothering me lately, which wasn’t like me at all.

  “No, I honestly don’t think so. Do you really believe that?”

  “I don’t know what to believe anymore. I just know I don’t like it here. Hey, remember that time we thought our apartment was tiny?”

  That got another laugh out of her. “God, I’m never going to complain about that again.”

  We fell silent then, and I wondered if she was thinking the same thing as me – were we even going to be living together when we got out of this place? We sat there for a while, both of us lost in thought, neither one of us wanting to discuss the situation further. I wanted to get up, my legs were starting to cramp from the position, but I didn’t know where to go. The only place I really wanted to go was out of this pod. I hoped the door would open while I was leaned against it, and every now and again I could swear it moved. I’d look back and be surprised to see it still shut. Keri was in the same position, and every now and again our gaze would meet and we’d both look away. The two weeks hadn’t done much for our relationship, but in a way I was glad to have her there with me. We’d spent the entire time not really getting along, but feeling angry and annoyed was probably a lot better than feeling lonely.

  “Wonder how the others have gotten along?” she said all of a sudden, and I was grateful for the sound. The silence was horrible. Sometimes I thought I heard the sound of a ticking clock when the two of us weren’t talking. Then I’d realise that there was no clock, and I’d instantly think it was a bomb.

  “I’ve been wondering the same thing too. Think we’re the only ones left?”

  “I honestly have no idea. I sometimes forget there are people right here next to us, which sort of makes me think banging that door is no help. I mean, I haven’t heard a peep from either side of us. This place is completely sound proof.”

  “Sure, but they’re all in there by themselves. Who would they talk to?”

  Keri shrugged. “Themselves? The diary camera? I don’t know. I haven’t heard anything. Not even the sound of their shower. Sometimes I feel like you and I are the only ones going through this.”

  “Sometimes I feel like I’m in here alone,” I said.

  “Without me?”

  “Let’s be honest, Ke, we’re not going to win couple of the year after this.”

  She sighed. “No, we’re definitely not. Let me ask you something then, was this worth it? This whole experience. Was it worth it?”

  “When we walk out with the money I’ll probably say yes. Right now, I’m going with no. How about you?”

  “Hell no,” she said firmly. “I’m not even sure I’ll feel differently when we get the money.”

  “Why not?”

  “You really think this was worth the money?” she asked.

  “It’s a lot of money, Ke.”

  “And that, right there, is the difference between you and me. Money isn’t everything to me.”

  “Seriously?” I stood up, but the room closed in on me and I immediately sat back down again. My legs were aching from sitting on the floor, but I no longer knew what to do with myself. They should’ve made these rooms according to our height. The taller you were, the more space you were given. “You really think money is important to me?”

  “Yes, I do. Why did you do this then?”

  “For the experience. Of course for the money too, but that’s not the only reason. And you said yourself, winning that money would be great for you. We spoke for hours about what we were going to do with it when we got out. Don’t act like I’m the on
ly one in here who thought about winning. It’s not fair to put that on me.”

  “You’re right. The money would be wonderful, and yes that’s why I came in here. I figured two weeks was nothing for such a large sum. Want to know why it’s not worth it anymore to me, though?”

  “Because you’ve put on weight?” I said like a petulant teenager talking back to his mother.

  She sighed and let out one of her little laughs. The one she reserved for every time she was disappointed in me. The one I’d heard so many times before. “No, not because I’ve put on weight. None of this was worth it to me because I’m walking out of here without a boyfriend. I gained money, but lost you. And that,” she said as she stood up, “is why you and I are so different. I’ve always cared more about you than you have about me. Unfortunately, these two weeks have taught me that you and I are not destined to be. Everyone was right about you. You are an asshole.” She stormed, as much as she could in the little space she had, into the bathroom.

  I didn’t say anything. Neither did I get up to console her. I didn’t hear the water running so I had no idea what she was doing in there, but I couldn’t bring myself to go and find out. I wanted to get out of this place. I glared up at the camera, which seemed to be looking right at me, and narrowed my eyes at it.

  “What day is it?” I asked. “What day is it?”

  I heard a sound and thought someone was answering me back. I almost jumped up with elation until I realized that it was Keri crying in the bathroom.